Definitions, Redefined.

 We all have this ideas about ourselves in our heads: What we look like to others, what we are capable of, things that we always do, things that we never do. The reason why we are who we are is because we have a central construct that we follow, a normal of sorts. We also have definitions for what we can and cannot do. Even the most optimistic of people know that there are some things that they simply will never accomplish in life, just because it is so far out of their scope as a person.

But who said that these definitions can't change?

       I've been thinking about how much I have changed over the past few years (and even in the past 6 months) and I realize that I am doing things now that I would never even lay a pinky finger on in high school or before. Granted, a lot of it has to do with growing and maturity, but I can safely say that I've changed. For the better. I can talk to people on the phone in a professional manner. I can lead a workout without a single stutter or awkward joke. I can lead a meeting without panicking about this or that. I can study effectively for exams, accept bad workouts and injuries....the list goes on. After so many years of being unsatisfied with myself, I can finally sit back and say "You know what, I'm close to who I want to be." And that means so much.

 Changing isn't something that you can actively work towards, and everyone takes their own path. It could be an accumulation of experiences or an "aha!" moment that you have when you wake up one day. More than likely, it's a combination of the two. I can point to a single event, but I know that the things that I've piled onto my college plate have helped as well.

Workouts are the ultimate writers of our definitions. They show us what our bodies are capable of at that moment in time: in that fitness level, with that much sleep,fuel, stress level, and fatigue. Pushing yourself in a workout is the worst best feeling in the world. I swear, you can find clarity in the face of complete exhaustion. case in point: Over the summer, I did a swim workout ( I now call it the terrible 200's) that was 10x200 on an interval with short rest. Swimming is my weakest of the 3 sports, and it is always a source of frustration for me. So when I was already dying after 3 of them (read: 7 to go), I threw off my goggles, slammed them on the deck, and gasped "I...can't...do...this." This is a huge workout no-no. These are forbidden words, and I will never repeat them again. Luckily, I had coaches there to help me out. "It's ok, just go again at the top. You get an extra 30 seconds." I wasn't thrilled with this compromise, but I did it anyway. I finished the workout, with the last 3 200's 10 seconds faster than the absolutely awful first 3. At the end, I rested my head on the deck, still gasping, and thought "I did something special today." I redefined my idea of swimming. Maybe I could get better. The thought that kept me going that day was "I want this more than anything in the world." Keeping that desire in my mind helped me finish; because when you want to quit, you must remember why you started. Works every time.

Keep redefining yourself and your capabilities. Don't sit in your comfort zone, because nothing awesome ever happens there. Greatness happens the moment you step outside that zone, even if you fail. You are infinitely better just for taking that leap.

"Life is a series of unceremonious acts of courage." --Unknown (or, just me. not sure which)